People tend to respond to me as if they think that I agree with them. This is accurate. At least to an extent I do agree with them. The thing is, after I talk with two people with quite different viewpoints I get the feeling that they both think I agree with them. This is also often true. People make good and valid points on many sides of an issue. When I hear and understand those good and valid points, I agree with them. Even when my own filters say that any particular point they are making is not accurate, I usually determine that a position is deeply felt and that I am likely to learn more by not contesting the point they are trying to make. I believe that this is the correct approach. I have long contended that “feelings” are valid without proof that they are also “facts.”
During my whole, and now long, life people have treated me well. I am not sure why this is true. I sometimes say, “people treat me better than they should.”
My work as an attorney put me in a place where I represented people with whom I had serious disagreements, but unless those disagreements significantly affected my ability to represent them, I could set aside the issue and get on with the task at hand.
My work with Fools Mission has allowed me to work alongside people with very different cultural backgrounds, values and experiences. This is actually one of the most attractive parts of the organization: learning how to bridge differences and resolve issues side by side.
Respect is the bedrock requirement for understanding. The first UU principle of “dignity and respect for all people” was one of the things I found most compelling about Unitarian Universalism. If one has respect for others it is really easy to find common ground. Once on common ground, conversations become easier and more productive.
So what am I anticipating? I think that this will work. I don’t think that we will solve the problems of the world. But I do expect to return with a greater understanding than I had before we started.
-- David
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